Those of you who have been reading my blog over the last 6 months know that there have been several posts about the deaths of loved ones in our extended family. It feels like we have experienced more than our share of sadness and loss recently.
Unfortunately our family suffered another heartache this past month when my cousin, Melissa died tragically at the age of 24. I have been struggling with the sadness and shock of Melissa's death over the last weeks but I read a verse in Psalm 119 yesterday that reminded me where I need to find my comfort.
"My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word."
I definitely don't understand this tragedy but I do believe that the God I love can be trusted even when I don't understand, and that He will provide me with strength if I but ask Him.
I wanted to post a couple of pictures of Melissa as well as the letter I read at her funeral.
Me holding Melissa
My brother and I with Melissa (on my shoulders) and her sister, Lindsay.
Dear Melissa,
I remember the day you were born. I remember the phone call and how excited I was when my parents told me that I had a new little girl cousin and she had a head full of red hair – just like me! I knew right then that you were special!
I remember lots of visits with you when you were a little girl – a little ball of energy, chasing Aaron around and trying to steal his hat. Everyone called you Missy and it suited you. You were such a mischievous, adorable little pixie. When I got married and moved to Abbotsford, I lived closer to you, but you were becoming a teenager and had your own busy life so I didn’t see you as often. I regret that but I am thankful for the times we did have together, visiting at Boundary Bay and the somewhat annual birthday get-togethers at your Dad’s place. One of my favourite, more recent memories is of you playing hide-and seek with my kids at Ernie and Debby’s house in Cloverdale.
There are so many things I wish I had the chance to tell you Melissa. I don’t want to wallow in regrets and what-ifs but I do want to tell you this most important thing – that you are loved. By me, by the rest of your family, by your many friends, and most importantly, by God. I don’t pretend to have all the answers about why this tragedy happened to you Melissa but I know without a doubt that you are loved by God and that He is saddened, just as we are by this pain and sorrow. That is my comfort as I grieve the loss of you, my dear cousin.
I miss you Missy Jean.
Love from Christa
I remember the day you were born. I remember the phone call and how excited I was when my parents told me that I had a new little girl cousin and she had a head full of red hair – just like me! I knew right then that you were special!
I remember lots of visits with you when you were a little girl – a little ball of energy, chasing Aaron around and trying to steal his hat. Everyone called you Missy and it suited you. You were such a mischievous, adorable little pixie. When I got married and moved to Abbotsford, I lived closer to you, but you were becoming a teenager and had your own busy life so I didn’t see you as often. I regret that but I am thankful for the times we did have together, visiting at Boundary Bay and the somewhat annual birthday get-togethers at your Dad’s place. One of my favourite, more recent memories is of you playing hide-and seek with my kids at Ernie and Debby’s house in Cloverdale.
There are so many things I wish I had the chance to tell you Melissa. I don’t want to wallow in regrets and what-ifs but I do want to tell you this most important thing – that you are loved. By me, by the rest of your family, by your many friends, and most importantly, by God. I don’t pretend to have all the answers about why this tragedy happened to you Melissa but I know without a doubt that you are loved by God and that He is saddened, just as we are by this pain and sorrow. That is my comfort as I grieve the loss of you, my dear cousin.
I miss you Missy Jean.
Love from Christa
2 comments:
Christa,
I'm so sad with/for you and all these losses you've experienced recently. This post is so beautiful. I didn't know Melissa, but she sounds like a special woman, and was blessed to have you as her cousin.
Love you friend!
~Carmen
Oh Christa, I am so saddened for you and your family. It has been such a difficult year for you. We trust that God is working in your family more and more, although its really hard to see how.
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